The Amazing Power of Mindlessness

When I turned on my computer the other day, there was a article that "caught my attention" because it was about food (of course). It had a picture of a big, juicy cheeseburger that really reeled me in. It was one of those "Choose this, not that" articles about cheeseburger choices at various fast food places. In some sort of hypnotic state, I merrily clicked my way through the choices, admiring each of the accompanying photos. Then I began plotting, thinking about my schedule & trying to figure out how to get to the nearest fast food joint to get what looked best to me.

What looked best to me, you might wonder? I wanted the "not that" choices - the ones that had 42 grams of fat & 1200 calories!! There was this thrill of urgency, of excitement of "Oh, boy!"

And then I woke up! My mindfulness kicked in.

Do you know what was the most amazing part of this for me? I don't even like cheeseburgers!! I don't remember the last time I had one on purpose (although it probably was when somebody made one & I ate it because I needed to put what I perceived as their need before mine - & yes, Dear Reader, I will devote an article to that subject, I promise)

I learned years ago that cheeseburgers give me tremendous indigestion & heartburn. I feel crummy after I eat one.

So what on earth was going on here? Was I delusional?

In fact, I mindlessly got carried away by old habitual patterns. I used to love high fat, high calorie foods, in part, because I never paid sufficient attention to myself or to my body to notice the effect of these foods, other than the resultant fat that accumulated on my body. I had reverted to old ways of thinking. I had been carried away by the fantasy of the "fun" factor that I perceived in the pictures.

So what happened when I say that "I woke up?" That's when I became mindful of my experience. I became aware of the present moment where I was sitting in front of my computer screen with my mouth watering.

It was as if I had awoken from a dream. Now I once again had my wits about me & became curious about what was really going on.

Sometimes when something like this happens it's just because I'm tired & fall back into old ways of thinking.

Other times it's a signal to me that I need a break from what I'm doing - even a 5 min. walk can make a big difference.

Other times it's because I'm hungry & I haven't been paying attention to my body's signals.

Or perhaps I need a little more fun in my day.

Maybe I need to make a connection with a friend.

It always boils down to needing to slow down, take a couple of nice, deep breaths & bring my attention back to me. I need to get to a centered place where I can calmly reflect on what I really need.

So, you might be able to see, that my mindless eating patterns of my past were attempts by me to get my own attention. Back then I knew I wanted something, so I gave myself food - lots & lots of food.

But it never seemed to be enough. It never would be enough because food was not was I was starved for. I was hungering for a deep, nurturing relationship with myself.

You will see that this is an ongoing theme for me & for many others who have become mindful eaters: What do you really want?

Even though your thinking might be screaming, "Food!" "Food!", keep asking yourself,
"WHAT DO I REALLY WANT AND NEED?"